


You

by Hiway202



Series: Friendship [2]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Bisexuality, F/F, Love Confessions, One Shot, Originally Posted on FictionPress.com
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-18
Updated: 2017-05-18
Packaged: 2018-11-02 04:24:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,897
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10936935
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hiway202/pseuds/Hiway202
Summary: The story about a bisexual girl and the love of her life that she can't have.





	You

You. Let's called you Riley. That's what you wanted to be called for seventh grade anyway.

I love you. There, I said it. I, let's call me Katerina (even though my real name is on my bio if you wanted to know it that badly), Katerina Jacobs love you. I do.

You wrote in my yearbook, and I quote, "I've never said this to anyone other than my parents. But I love you! ~Riley Anne Jones." I'm sorry it took so long for me to realize I love you back.

I finally admitted my bisexuality to my parents. It took me four years. But you helped me figure out I was bi, wether you know it or not. Ever since you wrote on your Deviantart: Sexuality: Bi. Or straight, I'm not entirely sure. When I copied that journal and filled it out for myself and got to that question I keeper the answer you wrote and moved on. You commented on that journal like you commented on everything of mine: nice!

Did you mean my sexuality? Is it my fault we aren't a thing?

Let's see, what else.

Beginning Band. That was fun. I decided I wanted to play the drums. When I told Johnson, the band teacher, what instrument I wanted to play, one girl snickered and said, "You mean percussion."

Band started a week or so later and we were shown around by Josie, at the time. (She (He?) is Oliver now) who showed us the percussion instruments.

The first day we all played as a band, Josie had you and me sit next to each other as we were the ones who had never played an instrument before. When Johnson had the clarinets play a note I whispered to you, "Every time I hear a clarinet play I think of Squidward from SpongeBob SquarePants and I think it sounds terrible." You laughed.

As we got further into band, we would always whisper to each other. We told each other secrets and it was fun.

But I guess when we first started becoming friends was the day I wore my OMGPOP t-shirt. You said, "Oh my God someone finally actually knows what that website is!" I said, "I know, right!"

Then, you joined Ballet class, transferring from Dance class. We took our class photo that day and I always tried to stand next to you.

A week later, we ran the mile in class and this was still when we had a break the rest of class after we ran the mile. You were sitting in a corner with your binder and so I thought I'd go join you. I asked what you were doing and you said you were writing a story. That's when you got me thinking, Hey! I love writing! so I went to my locker and got my binder. I brought it up and I sat next to you and we just sat and wrote for the whole period. You got me into writing again. I got a whole binder. It was thick and packed with paper, pens, pencils, erasers, and my writing. I never thanked you for that, so, thanks.

I actually never thanked you for a lot of things. Like, for example, as I said above, thank you for showing me I was bisexual. Not that you did anything to do that. You just were there. And I finally realized that, sadly I think it was a little too late.

I know it was too late. You have a boyfriend now. Last I checked at least. You wore his boxers at my house during my birthday party. My sixteenth birthday party. His name is, let say, Jordan. He's nice, but I still wish you weren't with him. But then I think that that's a terrible thought and I shouldn't be thinking that about my friend. Why would someone who loves someone so much want them to be unhappy?

I thought I heard you say Jordan was gay once. Or maybe he's bi. Or maybe your just his cover. Whatever the reason, I don't know. I still wish you were with me and not him.

Thinking about this just makes me want to think about the good times and not the bad times. So let's go back in time again. Back to seventh grade.

When my thirteenth birthday was coming up, I was thinking of who I was going to invite. I was friends with, let's call her Ari, and, let's call her Josophine. I was also going to invite two of my friends from my old school, let's call them Beverly and Ava. But I was silently thinking am I going to invite you? We weren't really one hundred percent friends yet, but we walked laps together on the mile day and we talked in Beginning Band. But I was also scared to invite you. I was afraid you would say no.

I finally decided to invite you. You said yes. We had the party. (Ava couldn't come.) We played truth or dare with dry humping (humping with your clothes on) and I had to dry hump Ari the most. When we dry humped, it was awkward. I added a dare to the truth or dare app when we all took turns adding truths and dares. It said, "Make out with somebody. ;)" When the dare popped up, everyone wanted to know who added it. We all decided it was probably Beverly.

When we were done playing truth or dare we made prank calls. We wrote ideas in notebooks. I still have all the ideas.

That night, we also warmed up a marshmallow in the microwave until it exploded. Then, you and I cleaned it up. We also did the ice and salt challenge. Except me. I was too scared.

As seventh grade went on you introduced me to a manga. DeathNote. I bought the series and read it. You read it online. I let you borrow the final book with all the facts in it. To this day, I still have to read the twelfth book and finish the eleventh.

We would pretend to be Light and L. I was Light, and you were L. We made the handcuffs with some string and two hair ties and we would spend the whole day (or at least lunch onward) handcuffed together. You had just gotten a haircut so you looked like L now.

We went in to the girls bathroom and, I'm sorry. I regret this so much now. I said, "What if people come in here and wonder what a boy is doing in the girls' bathroom?" I didn't know then how much saying things like that hurt you. I know it hurts you now when people ask if your a boy or a girl. Your not transgender (as far as I know). Your a girl. And I apologize for my sister for every time you come over (so three times) asks if your a boy or girl repeatedly. Except the last time you came over when my mom bribed her with pizza. But I know she wanted to ask that. She's special ed. She doesn't know any better. I'm sorry.

Oh, and The Chair. Do you remember that? Why am I asking you, it's not like your reading this.

The Chair was a brown, metal, folding chair. It was sitting on the stage when we were auditioning for the seventh grade play. It was sitting at an eerie angle and it looked like something out of a horror movie. We decided that was going to be our film project when we took film in ninth grade. We were going to make it into a horror movie.

Am I the only one that remembers running around the school freaking out about The Chair? It was lunch time, and you and I decided that we were going to go on a hunt for The Chair. We ran in every room and there were brown folding chairs in every room and we were like, "We can't let them see us!" It was sort of like a hunt for Slenderman.

One day at lunch, we snuck up to the library (we weren't allowed to be with the high schoolers) and we went on the computers and we played Escape the Car from the Escape series. We had a contest to see who could beat the game first. I won.

Afterwards, when we were walking down to Drama you told me a secret. You told me English wasn't your native language. And I'm sorry, I can't remember what is.

You used to wear hats to school everyday. Like those cute little hats that you wear that cover your ears and have little fabric balls dangling from them. I remember that because I used to think your hats were really cute.

We would play games at lunch; you, Josophine, Ari, and me. Josophine would film them with her phone and we would play. Like we talked in gibberish one lunch. And once we jumped on the fries they served at school that were so hard and crispy that you couldn't break them by jumping on them. They hurt your teeth to eat them, too.

At the end of the year, it was time for you to sign my yearbook. You didn't buy one because they were seventy-five dollars or else I would have signed yours too. You wrote on the bottom of every page in my yearbook until page eighty-one. That's because you ran out of stuff to write. Just because I love what you wrote, I'll write it here:

Riley starts on pg. 2. Kat - LiLian, I Think thats how you say it... Well you are the best friend money could buy. XD I'm just kidding. Serously your awesome. Sometimes I wish you were my sister. Your an amazing writer. Your stories are always incredible. I can't imagine a world without you. (Light) It would be very boring. BTW it's cold outside. XD (dana) C'mon Riley Keep it together! What else could I say about you?... Enjoy this page... OK. I'm back. Have you ever wondered what O.K. stands for? Well I have. *shrug* So Let's talk. Wait this is going to be a very boring conversation... A one sided conversation. I've never had a conversation like that. I can deal with that. Moostaches are incredible. Well at least in my book. I forgot what we were talking about... whatever. So, there is a part in DeathNote is when right after L dies they bury L and Light stood on L grave and kinda freaked out. Ryuk thought he was crazy. I laughed because I needed to laugh after crying because of all the deaths in the shows. Show, Duh. Not Shows. Anyway, Am I the only one who thinks that it's weird that I can't cry at anything, but kill the characters in a show an I ball out tears. Very inpirational music. SYNCRONISED DANCE! YEAH! Listen to this L, I'll write names with my right hand and solve math equations with my left, I'll take this potato chip. AND EAT IT! Student number 15836 please sit normaly. Watashi wa Ly desu. (I'm L.) (/._.)/ TABLEFLIP! \\(._.\\) "I dashed down the stairs, fliped on the T.V. and landed on the couch." "Goo." Look up Hetalia and Happy Wheels Playlist PewDiePie. Hey, look were at our page. DERP DERP DERP DERP DERP DERP DERP DERP DERP DERP DERP OK, now I have no idea what to write. I love muffins wait I'm DERPY HOOVES. Sorry but that kid looks like my cousin and it's starting freak me out. oh great Mr. Kerry is on this page. I'm starting to run out of ideas on what to write in this book. Do you have any ideas? Right you can't answer that... I feel stupid. I don't think I'm going to get to my goal. Whatever. Sorry. :) Your awesome and I don't think I could live without. I'm sad I don't want this school year to end I've never said this to anyone other than my parents. But I love you! ~Riley Anne Jones.

Now, since I didn't get to write in your yearbook, I'll write something for you here:

Riley. You were my best friend ever. I never really had a best friend until you showed up. You showed me that I could be the best writer I could be. You also showed me how to have fun and not just sit in a corner waiting for the bell to ring so I could go home for the day. Sure, I've had friends before, but never a best friend. You were my favorite person in the whole world. I don't mean for that to sound as creepy as it does. I don't want to end up like my brother, stalking girls and not leaving them alone, but you were truly special. Are truly special. And I should have taken your hints earlier. I should have known what you were thinking. We were best friends. And we could have been so much more. I never got the chance to tell you this. I love you. It probably doesn't mean as much because I've said it before to my ex-boyfriend and other ex-boyfriend. But, besides when I said it to my parents, I only meant it once. And now. I definitely mean it now. I love you. ~Katerina Elizabeth Jacobs.

Eighth grade. You made some new friends. I didn't think you missed me.

I cut myself. I only told Ari, but she told the principal and then my parents were told. I stayed home from school for a month. When I came back you hugged me. Hard.

I never wanted it to end.

But it did. And I had to wonder. Did you hug me because I was gone for so long or because Ari told you why I was gone. Something tells me it was the latter. Or a little bit of both.

I realized I had a crush on you in eighth grade. We were in that play together at MYACT. Once on this Island. We were both peasants. We were hanging out backstage talking about all sorts of stuff. And I remember being there for at least an hour and I said, "They probably forgot we are here. That's how you know we're not so important to this show."

We auditioned together. We totally blew it, but we did it together.

And one time backstage you mouthed, "Olive juice," to me. Then you said, "Doesn't that look like I'm mouthing I love you?"

We came up with a parody of Once on this Island. It was a rock parody. Not a rock and roll parody, but literally a rock parody. Like a rock you find on the ground. It all started because of that one song. I can't remember what it's called right now, but it's on the tip of my tongue. It went, "I shall find a tree all covered in mangos. Juicy mangos, fat and well fed. Pick a mango. A juicy mango. A lovely mango. A poisoned mango. Drop the mango. *whistle downwards* KABOOM! And knock some sense in her head."

And so I was in our outdoor green room with you and I was thinking, How will a mango knock some sense in someone's head? And so there were some rocks and so I said, "I shall find a tree all covered with rocks. Juicy rocks, fat and well fed." And our parody expanded from there. We called it Once on this Boulder.

When Once on this Island ended I almost told you I loved you.

Almost.

At the end of eighth grade you signed my yearbook. But all you did was write one sentence.

That year you also hung out with new friends. They were in our grade. And it was sad because you didn't hang out with me.

One thing that happened in eighth grade was that you and this boy, let's call him Eli, made a list of what you hated about everyone in our seventh and eighth grade class. You two got caught and you took the blame, but you had nothing to do with it.

At our trip to Wonder Valley, the eighth grade graduation trip, you hung out with me. I remember going down the watersides, you, Ari, Josophine, and me, and timing ourselves as we slid down.

In ninth grade, that's when we grew apart. We used to talk every "A day" at school in Film class. Then, when I went to the hospital for a week and a half and was out of school, we kinda grew apart. And now, in eleventh grade, I'm on independent study. And you have a lot of friends. I only have you and Josophine (Ari moved away). And I miss you. I miss you so much.

Also in ninth grade you drew me a picture for my birthday. You put it in a frame and gave it to me. It's a Danny Phantom picture, my favorite cartoon.

So, ending this, I just want to say, I'm not trying to be creepy. I just needed to write how I felt about you. And though part of me hopes you'll read this, part of me hopes you won't out of embarrassment.

I love you.

You.


End file.
